well guys, i said i should probably give you a little update on how things are going, since the last journal was so short and factual and some of you seem to actually give a crap about my mental state as well as teh facts

so yeah, current situation is that i am most definatly moving to the uk. i woke up last wendsday morning and decided it was what i wanted to do. going over on the 29th hopefully and in one stoned week managed to organise everything. getting the money for my bus and booking them friday hopefully, though if i get the money before i'll do it before... its only 40euro so shouldnt be hard. i'm going to get my ID finished sorted tomorrow too, as i already have the pics and the money for it but i cant book my bus until i know 100% when my ID is going to be here.

i'm prob gonna go down to moms next monday for a week or so so i wont have internet access, but it feels important for me to spend some time with my famiy before I go, as i probably wont see them again for years, and when i do i will be a very different person.

to be honest, right now i just feel so much apreciation for this site. its sort of amazing how things have changed on here though, since i first started using the place in 2005, and met luke here in 2006. for that reason i dont think i will ever leave here.

yep its true. i hate to admit it but i'm joining hundreds and thousands of others like me who have met the love of their life on this site and ran off to marry them. hell, i can already think of three couples off the top of my head who are now living together having met on here, and soon i'll make it number four. it really does make me realise how good this place is though, because unlike social networking sites people here at least have one thing in common before they start talking, a love of art. and hell, relationships from here do work... i'm living proof of that because i've been in love with him for four years, though its only thanks to ~SpartanB292 that i was able to realise and accept that, over three years after i first met him.

i know so many people who have left dA and never returned, or left dA and then came back, but i can honestly never see myself being one of those people. i'm here for the long run baby, until i die or the site goes down, whichever comes first. i might get busy and not be here so often or be so active on the chats, but thanks to this place bringing me to him i dont think i will never stop coming back, because hell... its loyalty man. i've met so many good friends on here and i'm going to make so many more and i know that.

as this stage of my life comes to an end here in ireland, my thoughts really are with deviantart and all the people here who've helped me through the past few years. my thoughts are focused on :icontifa-lavigne: and of course, above all else, on my Luke, on who was the first person i ever spoke to on here, and will also be the last i believe.

i'm doing it guys. so many of you have known about my feelings for him for so long, and on 1st of May 2010 i will finally get to be with him. i've loved him for four years, and i know i will continue to live with him, and its suddenly become real. hes not just Luke who was Wallwager any more... hes Luke who is my future and is within reaching distance.

i owe it all to deviantart.

I'm happier now than i've ever been in my life, and i know in a few short weeks i'll be even happier, and that this happiness will last forever. i've been waiting long enough for it, its time to go and get it and be truly happy for once and for all. lots of my friends dont approve of me going but i know its the right choice, this is where my heart belongs and where it all i will... i know i'll be homesick for a few weeks but then i'll be safe and happy and in my new life.

this is signing off

forever and always